For the new kids, it's...

THE ULTIMATE VIDEO RUMBLE
Frequently Asked Questions v1.5

(v.1.5 - we're crazy!)

TABLE OF CONTENTS

General Questions

  1. What in the hell is this?
  2. Who writes it?
  3. What games are in it?
  4. How do you pick the games?
  5. When do new Rumble sections come out?
  6. Do you guys need more writers?
  7. Where do you get the ideas for character personalities?
  8. Is there anything else like it?
  9. How does the voting work?
  10. Why are the votes called "live/die"? The characters don't actually die, do they?
  11. How do I vote?
  12. Is there a mailing list?
  13. Do you have lives at all?
  14. Why does the Security Officer change every Rumble?
  15. What are the "glosses"?
  16. Why did UVR2 take so long to finish?
  17. What do the "staff members" do?
  18. Can you send me Section [whatever]?
  19. Why does everyone have a nickname?
  20. Hey, why don't you use (game/character)?
  21. You know, you screwed up (character's) personality. It should be like this...
  22. (From both Gavok and Glen Morris) How do you determine who throws out who?
  23. (From Gavok, again) How do you determine the draw?
  24. How do you determine which characters get in from the partial games?
  25. What the hell is going on in the chat room?

FREQUENTLY ASKED STORYLINE QUESTIONS (UVR2)

  1. What in the hell is the "Overfiend," and why does everyone confuse it with Omega Red?
  2. Who was the guy in the cloak with the glowing red eyes?
  3. Why wasn't Saishu Kusanagi involved with the showdown between Kyo and Iori?
  4. What's with the constant White Wolf references?
  5. Pyron knows Kintaro?
  6. What happened to Huitzil and Sentinel when Jack-2 reprogrammed all the robots?
  7. Who the hell is "Jon"?

FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS (UVR3)

  1. Why is Iron & Blood in UVR3?
  2. Why isn't [game] in UVR3?
  3. Why are the Sections archived at the UVR3 Resource Site HTMLized?
  4. Hey, you screwed up in Section Two Results.
  5. What in the name of Moxy Fruvous is Eddy Gordo doing in Quake 2?

General Questions

  1. What in the hell is this?
  2. It's a virtual tournament; that is to say, it's an elaborate crossover interactive fan-fiction starring characters from various fighting video games like Street Fighter, Mortal Kombat, King of Fighters, and Fatal Fury, among others. Our readers vote at the end of each new Section as to who will survive to the next round, and whoever is still standing at the end of the fanfic is the winner!

  3. Who writes it?
  4. UVR3 is currently scripted/co-plotted by Thomas "Wanderer" Wilde, co-plotted/edited by Christopher "Birdman" Bird, with contributions and glosses from Isaac "Mimic" Sher, and is published by Scott "Silverbolt" Archer with the occasional catchy comment. In the past, it was written by Birdman with assistance from Austin Loomis, Brant "Brant Rogers" Rogers, Scott Johnson, and/or Bob "Boobwod" Wood.

    Archiving duties are handled for UVR1 and part of 2 by Birdman and, for UVR2 and 3, Scott "Silverbolt" Archer, at [http://wabakimi.carleton.ca/~cbird/uvr.html] and [http://www.slack.net/~arctic/rumble.html], respectively.

  5. What games are in it?
  6. Whatever fighting games are new at the time of the writing, with occasional representation by whatever games we think are cool. Arcade games usually predominate, with the occasional side-scroller or home-game fighter thrown in for variety. A roster of the fighters included will usually be archived alongside sections of the Rumble.

    The roster for UVR3 is up at [http://www.slack.net/~arctic/uvr3/uvr3-roster.html].

  7. How do you pick the games?
  8. If we think a game is cool, or if we think a game's characters would be fun to write, we add it. Usually, we try to keep the number significantly low. Also usually, we fail miserably and wind up with a character count in the triple digits. It's an addiction more powerful than heroin, this fanfic, and we hope to get help soon.

  9. When do new Rumble sections come out?
  10. Whenever the hell they're done being written and edited. Sending Wanderer or Birdman mail asking or threatening for the next Section won't speed it up. We are, after all, college students with vital and exciting lives to lead, you know.

  11. Do you guys need more writers?
  12. Like a sixth hole in the head. Next question, please. (This question gets asked so often it's silly.)

  13. Where do you get the ideas for character personalities? (also known as the "Hey, why does Haohmaru yell so much?" question)
  14. A lot of the characters we deal with in the Rumble were also used in the Dream Tournaments, our ideological predecessors, and thus come handily equipped with personalities. The rest we usually assign character traits based upon such things as victory quotes, victory stances, anime movies (where applicable), personal preference, or little quirks. Then again, this ain't exactly War And Peace, so we don't try very hard to stay away from cliches.

    A more in-depth version of this process can be found at [http://www.geocities.com/TimesSquare/3975/dt.html], Sean "Kinsman" Givan's homepage, who originated a lot of the personality quirks we use today.

  15. Is there anything else like it?
  16. If there is, there's a lawsuit in the making, and we'd like to know about it so we know where to send the subpoena.

    Other virtual-tournaments, though, aren't that common. The Dream Tournaments, which were archived at [ftp://brawl.ecom.net/pub/dream-tournament] and are no longer (DTIV is currently archived at [http://www.geocities.com/SoHo/Lofts/6102/dtiv.html], started this whole breed of fanfic off. We're a spinoff of that. Another spinoff, the Multiverse Video Fighters' Council, is currently [10/16/98] on hiatus due to server changes and personal issues.

    Irritatingly enough, Wanderer has written or is writing for both of them. That boy ain't right.

  17. How does the voting work?
  18. At the end of a Section, there should be a voteform lying around in the same newsgroup or further down the page. Fill it out and send it to whoever it says to send it to, which will usually be Wanderer at one of his many many e-mail addresses.

    There should be an even number of fighters to vote for. Split your votes between those you wish to live and those who should die (example: with twenty fighters in the ring, you have ten "live" and ten "die" votes to assign as you will), and whoever have the best ratios of live to die survive the round. Those who don't, are hurled into whatever fate awaits them outside the ring.

  19. Why are the votes called "live/die"? The characters don't actually die, do they?
  20. If they're skillful and lucky (and Wanderer's feeling benevolent), no. If they're unpopular with the writers and Wanderer's coming off of a serious bad day, then they're dead meat on a stick. We're capricious bastards sometimes.

    As a general rule, however, eliminations are written more to be funny than deadly. The exception, of course, is for characters who absolutely suck, i.e. Eddy Gordo or the War Gods.

  21. How do you vote?
  22. Give out an equal number of "live" and "die" votes to the fighters on the ballot; usually there'll be twenty. BTW, the number of eliminations in a round does not, repeat, not, influence the number of votes you cast. It's always gonna be ten "live" and ten "die", or however many it is.

  23. Is there a mailing list?
  24. Yes. Of course, it's an anarchistic, completely unreliable mailing list maintained by noted technodweeb Wanderer, whose mutant talent appears to be interfering with the operation of otherwise reliable mailing systems and servers, but it is a mailing list. Ask to be put on it when you send in a voteform.

  25. Do you two have lives at all?
  26. I will kick you in the nuts.

  27. Why does the Security Officer change every Rumble?
  28. They're kind of like the drummers for Spinal Tap. We always manage to lose them by the end.

  29. What are the "glosses"?
  30. Austin Loomis began writing what he called "glosses" or "wrapups" of the UVR Sections starting with the first one. The glosses are kind of like UVR-flavored Mystery Usenet Theater. Occasionally, they introduce plot elements, and usually, they focus on the behind-the-scenes operation of the Rumble and its staff in ways we usually don't have time for. They are a decent read, are deliberately and consistently funny, unlike the Rumble itself, and they can make you look at the Sections in a new light as well as introducing new plot elements. [For those of you with an eye for detail, Austin appears in the results for UVR1 Section One as the grieving fan of Sarah Bryant.] Currently, the glosses for UVR1 aren't archived anywhere; the first few of UVR2's can now be found at http://www.dejanews.com]. Use rec.games.video.arcade as your target newsgroup and Austin George Loomis as the author.

  31. Why did UVR2 take so long to finish?
  32. Birdman's school duties interfered with his ability to write the UVR. After a year and a half's worth of the UVR lying idle, Wanderer stumbled onto the UVR via a link from Sean Givan's page, and decided after a couple of months that the only way he was going to see this finished was to do it himself. Of course, as is the curse of UVR writers, his homework then proceeded to suck like a French hooker, hence explaining why the Final Section of UVR2 took so long to get out.

    Now, of course, UVR3 is here, and the chaos just keeps increasing. Wanderer leads a strange enough life that new Sections can sometimes take a while, but tirelessly, he will prevail.

  33. What do the "staff members" do?
  34. Within the UVR fanfiction itself, the staff members work in the Rumbledome to make sure the media event that is the Ultimate Video Rumble goes off without a hitch. Birdman and Wanderer usually are in the Command Booth commenting upon the Rumble, and the Security Chief's job is to make sure that those fighters who are not in the ring behave themselves, typically through the utilization of ridiculously large firearms. We also usually have at least one correspondent from the Multiverse Video Network, which is the august body responsible for projecting this upon your retinas (that was Austin Loomis' job in UVR2).

    Outside the fanfiction, the staff members write the Rumble and the glosses in varying amounts. Odds are good that the more a member appears in the fanfiction, the more of a role he's had in what you're reading.

  35. Can you send me Section [whatever]? (Also known as the "Hey, could you send me everything I've missed so far" question)
  36. No. That's what the archive sites and mailing list are for.

    Ask again and we will call in a favor from the local Mafia and have them do unpleasant things to you involving a power drill, field mice, and masking tape.

  37. Why does everyone have a nickname?
  38. It was a quirk of the Dream Tournament that everyone on the staff had a nickname, and it's one we've sorta carried on. Some rebels tend to buck that tradition, though, enabling us to give them a different nickname at the end of every Section just 'cause we can.

  39. Hey, why don't you use (game/character)?
  40. Well, if they're not in the current Rumble, then there could be a lot of reasons.

    1. They suck rocks and we hate them. We would kill their designers if we could. We will drive them before us, and slay them, and hear the lamentations of their women. (This is the case with KI2's absence from UVR3.)
    2. The game's too old. (For example, Time Killers. After two Rumbles, two Dream Tournaments, and eight years, we've decided to retire them.)
    3. The character isn't from a tournament/side-scrolling fighter. (i.e. most RPG characters, such as Aya Brea or Barrett.)
    4. The character's cool and we'd use him/her, but s/he hasn't had an update since the twelfth of Never. Maybe if s/he's in another game.(Hence the rationale for excluding certain Street Fighters.)
    5. We didn't think of that in time/we didn't remember to put them in before we set the draw in stone, and we may use the character yet. Thank you. (i.e. Clay Fighters. This one's for you, Glen.)
    6. There are too many characters in the Rumble already and we don't want to screw our numerical balance. (Which is why Tekken's never been fully represented; how many characters are in Tekken 2/3? And how many of them intrinsically suck?)

  41. You know, you screwed up (character's) personality. It should be like this...
  42. You can write your own story if you've a problem with ours, fanboy. :)

    We reserve the right to override characterizations in favor of one that's more amusing than the one established by the game. For example, we stand firm in our conviction that we can write better than anyone ever employed by Namco, hence we'll obviously have different takes on the characters than those provided by other writers or by the game itself. This is why, for example, Yoshimitsu is a bloodthirsty killer in Tekken 3 and a lovable robot scamp in the UVR; it's because we can, damn your eyes.

  43. (From Gavok and Glen Morris) How do you determine who throws out who?
  44. It's completely the writer's prerogative. :) The votes a character receives determines how many eliminations s/he gets; it's then a question of what suggests itself over the course of writing the Section.

  45. (From Gavok, again) How do you generate the draws?
  46. Randomly, save for the odd exception for storyline.

  47. How do you determine which characters get in from the partial games?
  48. Writer and editor bias. Without reservation.

  49. What the hell is going on in the chat room?
  50. Unadulterated silliness.

    The chatroom (available through the main page, or in a special modified version at [http://www.icok.net/~gankboy/hackchat.html], started in late October when Silverbolt thought it'd be a neat idea. It quickly got a pretty steady cast of regulars, and tends to be the most active really, really late at night. Wanderer, at least, spends way too much damn time there. Yes, you too can play fun parlor games like Beat The Hell Out Of The MMK, Cooler Than Chris, and Hiding In The Rafters From Tiffa!

    As for the often-mentioned Octagon Rumble, well... sheesh. [http://www.icok.net/~gankboy/octagonfaq.html]

    For a quick introduction to the chat room regulars, stop by Wanderer's spur-of-the-moment chat roster at [http://www.geocities.com/Athens/Parthenon/3114/chatroom.html]. It really is that damn insane.

Storyline Questions

  1. Who in the hell is the "Overfiend," and why does everyone confuse it with Omega Red?
  2. The Overfiend is an anime character, and it has tentacles. Lots of them. And it's scary bad.

    It was a joke; relax.

  3. Who was the guy in the cloak with the glowing red eyes from UVR2?
  4. The "guy in the cloak" appeared in one of the introductory pieces to tell a bunch of heroes what Demitri was up to regarding Haohmaru. His identity remained a mystery for much of the Rumble.

    S P O I L E R

    S P A C E

    In the results for Section Fifteen, it is revealed that the "guy in the cloak" was Kintaro, missing an eye as a result of Shao Kahn's beating.

  5. Why wasn't Saishu Kusanagi involved with the showdown between Kyo and Iori?
  6. Saishu was teleported back to the KOF95 node along with Rugal before that showdown occurred; this was supposed to be in the narrative, but that paragraph was apparently abducted by gremlins. He does show up in Kyo's hallucination at the beginning of Section Fifteen results, however, gloating about what his son has become.

  7. What's with the constant White Wolf references?
  8. Both Birdman and Wanderer are big World of Darkness fans, and Birdman injected it into the storyline back in UVR1 just for grins. For the record, in UVR continuity, Demitri Maximov is a Ventrue, Morrigan is a Malkavian, Lilith is a Caitiff, Jon Talbain is a Bone Gnawer, and Sabrewulf is a Shadow Lord (albeit a lame one). Misty John, the UVR's Magic(k) Security Officer, is an Akashic Brother. Gabriel Stevens, UVR3's Technomagic(k) Security Officer, is a Virtual Adept.

    For those of you who don't know what the hell I just said, it doesn't really matter; it's just an in-joke.

    "Life Reflects Art" Note: Vampire Savior (Darkstalkers 3) cabinets will usually have the World of Darkness logo on them as a promotional gimmick. It's interesting to have this sanctioned by Capcom. :)

  9. Pyron knows Kintaro?
  10. Yup, from Dream Tournament III. Reread Round Two and the Million Dollar Melee.

  11. What happened to Huitzil and Sentinel when Jack-2 reprogrammed all the robots?
  12. Huitzil was eliminated about five minutes beforehand by Chun Li, and hence wasn't in the right dimension at the time (to say nothing of being a bigass pile of scrap). Sentinel was never a part of the "get Sub-Zero" plot, so he wasn't reprogrammed either. Sektor was, effectively, the only one reprogrammed; he was a "commanding officer" of sorts.

  13. Who the hell is "Jon"?
  14. Jon, an annoying little kid crushed to a shadow by Colossus in the final Section, is a metaphor for Jonathon Spires, a near-legendary troll on the old MVFC feedback boards. At the time Wanderer was writing the results, Spires was being particularly annoying, so action was taken.

    This is why it is unwise to screw around with writers, ladies and gentlemen. They are extraordinarily petty.

Frequently Asked Questions (UVR3)

  1. Why is Iron & Blood in UVR3?
  2. I&B, a graphically interesting but moderately unplayable game for the PSX, is in because Birdman really liked it and it's a good source of thugs/throwaway heroes.

    Plus, one-armed dwarves whup ass.

  3. Why isn't [game] in UVR3?
  4. The current leaders of the pack as far as 'games/characters that should've been in UVR3' are King of Fighters '97, Time Killers (and/or just Rancid), Dead or Alive (apparently solely to put Mai Shiranui and Kasumi in the same general area -- boingy, boingy, boingy...), Bloody Roar, Rival Schools, a bunch of SFEXers but most notably Skullomania, Ned the Janitor, Pojo the Chicken, and Mokujin.

    The long and short of it is that UVR3 was plotted out over the summer of '97, when most of these games were not yet out. Hence, they aren't in the Rumble. Either that, or they're stupid. KOF97 isn't in the Rumble because a) it hadn't been out yet, and b) Orochi versions of characters piss us off (the New Faces team sucks now and forever, folks; they're Richard Meyer's unholy spawn dressed up in S&M gear and moon boots).

  5. Why are the Sections archived at the UVR3 Resource Site HTMLized?
  6. Because Scott Archer is a workaholic.

  7. Hey, you screwed up in Section Two Results.
  8. Because Wanderer was leaving on an extended vacation the next day, Section Two Results were written in a frenzy. Any number of small details and typographical errors were committed as a result, and they will be fixed eventually. Trust us, we already know that the errors are there; UVR readers are a fanatically precise lot.

  9. What in the name of Moxy Fruvous is Eddy Gordo doing in Quake 2?
  10. When Eddy was eliminated in Section One, there was much rejoicing. (Yay.) There was actually a minor organization founded on the spot directly afterwards, known as the KED (Keep Eddy Dead), which was headquartered in the UVR Chat Room and led by the redoubtable Captain Calzone.

    This snuck into Section Two as the arrival of a massive bribe to the UVR offices, which spurred Wanderer to include Eddy vs. Q2 in Section Four, because Wanderer dislikes hate mail just as much as anyone else.

    More questions? Fire away!